This is not the finish line...

I'll be a spectator at the Olympic Marathon Trials on Saturday and the 40th Anniversary of the Houston Marathon on Sunday. But, it's not where I want to be. I want to be out there running it!

I have decided not to run in the Houston Marathon on Sunday. After battling with foot pain for the last 8 weeks, common sense tells me that it's not wise to attempt the distance. I am just now starting to walk without pain and I believe that if I were to run 26.2 miles that I would prolong my recovery. I'll be honest - I'm ready to run again. Resting, icing, taking it easy - this just isn't for me. I need to be back on my feet and hopping. I have a lot to look forward to, also. A snow skiing trip and a half marathon in March and the Napa to Sonoma half marathon in July. That being said, Houston is my home and they put on a world-class, top-of-the-line race. This year I had the opportunity to visit a few different race venues and let me tell you, Houston is the best in Texas.

I am heart-broken that I am not running on Sunday. I have grieved over this decision. Believe it or not, I have even gone through the stages of grief:

1. Shock & Denial - "my foot doesn't hurt, see I can still run!"
2. Pain & Guilt - "ouch, that does hurt, maybe I've pushed myself too hard"
3. Anger & Bargaining - "dammit, why does my foot hurt?! what if I take a few days off, I'll go slower - then it'll feel better, right?"
4. Depression - "I guess I'm not running, I'll probably never run again."
5. The Upward Turn - "it's just one race."
6. Reconstruction & Working Through - "almost pain-free!"
7. Acceptance & Hope - "there's always next year!"

I think I'm definitely in the last few stages. I'm sad, but it'll be ok. I don't want to be a spectator in my life, so I'm going to take the time to heal and re-prioritize. Hopefully, in the long run (literally) I'll come back stronger. As you know, this was going to be another BQ for me. I'm not giving up. This isn't the finish line, just a short pause in the marathon of my life. My journey is far from over.

I'm reading Jesus Calling by Sarah Young - devotions for every day of the year. I made my official "I'm not running" decision over the weekend and this is what I read on Monday:

I am with you and for you. When you decide on a course of action that is in line with My will, nothing in heaven or on earth can stop you. You may encounter many obstacles as you move toward your goal, but don't be discouraged - never give up! With my help, you can overcome any obstacle. Do not expect an easy path as you journey hand in hand with Me, but do remember that I, your very-present Helper, am omnipotent.

Much, much stress results from your wanting to make things happen before their times have come. One of the main ways I assert My sovereignty is in the timing of events. If you want to stay close to Me and do things My way, ask Me to show you the path forward moment by moment. Instead of dashing headlong toward you goal, let Me set the pace. Slow down, and enjoy the journey in My Presence. 

Romans 8:31; Psalm 46:1-3; Luke 1:37

So, this is what I'm doing now. I'm slowing down, enjoying the journey.